This will be easier said than done since, besides completing the requisite Navy SEAL-like training program, the young apprentice has a lot of rough edges that need smoothing, including a grating cockney accent. Today, Harry hopes to make it up to his dearly departed partner by taking on his orphaned son, Eggsy (Taron Egerton), as a protégé. But as a Kingsman, he belongs to an exclusive fraternity of nattily-attired spies who abide by the motto “Manners Maketh Man.” Members of this covert organization consider themselves modern-day knights, and they see their suits as body armor.ĭespite an otherwise distinguished service record, Harry still regrets the mistake he made during a 1997 operation in the Middle East that cost a colleague his life. Harry Hart (Colin Firth) is such an unassuming, buttoned-downed bloke that no one in his right mind would suspect him to be a highly-skilled secret agent capable of killing at the drop of a derby. To see a trailer for Da Sweet Blood of Jesus, visit: What would Jesus do, Spike? Repent! Fair (1 star) Besides gratuitous slaughter, the film indulges in frontal nudity and eroticized violence, including a sleazy, lesbian sex scene that looks like an outtake from a soft core snuff film. To satisfy the craving, he steals some from a hospital, and he also embarks on a killing spree. Greene is stabbed with an ancient Ashanti artifact, when he develops an insatiable addiction to blood. This unrepentant bon vivant divides his time between New York City and an oceanfront summer home up on Martha’s Vineyard, living in the lap of luxury with the help of a private jet, a chauffeured Rolls Royce, and a loyal manservant (Rami Malek).

Hess Greene (Stephen Tyrone Williams), a wealthy anthropologist specializing in African Art History. Claims to the contrary notwithstanding, Da Sweet Blood of Jesus is basically a boring vampire adventure that’s severely lacking in terms of tension, thrills, premise, storyline, special f/x, plausibility, production value, editing and character development. Spike’s sharp decline as a filmmaker in recent years is nothing short of shocking, with Oldboy (2013) and Red Hook Summer (2012) also submitted for your disapproval. And after screening this disappointing indie, it’s obvious there was no reason to redo that picture either. But it also failed to inform investors that the crowdfunded feature was ostensibly-inspired by another Blaxploitation era horror flick, namely, Ganja & Hess (1973). The Kickstarter page where Spike Lee raised $1,418,910 from fans for his latest “Joint” expressly states that the money would not used to shoot a remake of Blacula (1972).

Seth and jaime slapdash